7 Steps to Finding Emotional Balance by Dr Roy Martina

Emotional Balance is Emotional Intelligence. Emotional Intelligence is the set of qualities and skills one has to achieve the following:

1. Not to take what others say, do or don’t do personal but to realize everyone is entitled to have their opinions (false or correct) criticism, compliments, expectations and emotional reactions to what they think to observe or not to observe in you.
2. To be able to speak your truth without the fear that you may hurt someone because they do not agree with your view of the world or how you see them. Communication is an art and speaking your truth can be intentionally or unintentionally hurtful. The goal is to be heard and that means to learn how to communicate your truth the best way to get the maximal impact and response that will invite both parties to respect each other. Impeccable speech is respectful and based on honesty and love.
3. To be able to clearly communicate your boundaries, saying no to what you don’t want and to be clear about your motivations of your actions.
4. To fully take responsibility for your emotions, how you feel and to know you always have a choice in how you want to feel. Your best option is to accept how you feel, understand why you feel like that and to balance the emotional disturbance. Return to a still point of neutrality so you can observe the situation without the influence of your ego and past and to make the best decision under the circumstances.
5. To know that every person is a mirror on which you project your unresolved issues of the past, react to that projection and they do the same towards you. By knowing this you can make the situation less personal and take responsibility to heal your past, so the same person or situation no longer provoke an emotional response.
6. To know that the purpose of life is to reach that state of Equanimity under all circumstances and that that is your only goal to make that path of learning joyful
7. To know that all challenges are created by your own spirit to have you connect with the true power inside of you and that there is no one to blame for your experience and that in the end you can transform all experiences into powerful lessons.

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Roy Martina is a holistic medical doctor with over 30 years experience helping people tap into their true selves and “cure the incurable” by understanding the connection between emotional balance and dis-ease. He is the author of over 40 books in Dutch and other languages. His bestselling book Emotional Balance: the path to inner peace and harmony has just been translated into English, and published by Hay House Publishers.

Subscribe to this blog to receive Roy’s weekly blog entry about self-healing, self-development, holistic medicine, spirituality and to be kept informed about Roy’s upcoming online and offline events.

- 28 July – 12 August. Summer Camp 2011: The 7th Sense – Veldhoven, The Netherlands http://bit.ly/jXCk6L

Love, Relationships and Success – How to Have them All

In life we have people who can do several things great at the same time and others who do not do so well. In order to juggle a loving relationship and career depends on many factors. The biggest factor is the needs of the 2 individuals and what they came to learn in that relationship.

There are some basic needs that will be incompatible with what you can deliver. Let’s say that your partners definition of a loving relationship is to walk in parks with the dogs and sit in front of the fireplace sharing the stories of the day and you take your work home or are to stressed out to relax, that will not work. So all depends on the expectations and needs of yourself and your partner. Some basic needs are approval, appreciation, care, respect, trust, admiration, encouragement to name a few. Many people think that the fulfilment of their basic needs should be done by their partner.

Then the next big thing is why you are in a relationship: for love, companionship, growth, sex, attention, friendship, etc. Some partners are great; they will have their own thing and can even be of support. Other partners will whine, complain and demand attention. So it is about what you want and what kind of partner you have. What is really important to you?  Be upfront and let the person you are starting to date know that you are a workaholic; that your career is important and that you are not giving that up. That is called expectation management up front. So they know what to expect of you.

Then you have to compromise and make agreements. What is important for the other?  How do you find common ground? Now you are building a solid foundation for a loving relationship. Enjoy and good luck!

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Roy Martina is a holistic medical doctor with over 30 years experience helping people tap into their true selves and “cure the incurable” by understanding the connection between emotional balance and dis-ease. He is the author of over 40 books in Dutch and other languages. His bestselling book Emotional Balance: the path to inner peace and harmony has just been translated into English, and published by Hay House Publishers.

Subscribe to this blog to receive Roy’s weekly blog entry about self-healing, self-development, holistic medicine, spirituality and to be kept informed about Roy’s upcoming online and offline events.

- 28 July – 12 August. Summer Camp 2011: The 7th Sense – Veldhoven, The Netherlands http://bit.ly/jXCk6L